You Don't Own Me Read online

  Kendra flinched, and a look of surprise washed over her face. “Steven, how did you even know that?”

  “You told me,” he said.

  “I don’t even remember that,” Kendra said mournfully.

  “Because you weren’t yourself back then. Anyway,” he said, finishing the last bite of his dessert, “I wanted you to know that this isn’t a case of Kendra making up accusations about Martin after his death. Everything she’s about to tell you? She told me all of it as it was happening. I saw her deteriorate within that marriage. I’ll leave you two alone now. You have a lot to talk about.”

  Laurie couldn’t help but notice that when Steven hugged Kendra good-bye, he was in no rush to let go.

  18

  Kendra began apologizing for her boss the second he left the restaurant. “As you can tell, he’s my loyal advocate. Thank God for him. He was the only friend I managed to keep after Martin was gone.”

  “Pardon the observation, but it seems like maybe he’s interested in being more than just a friend and advocate?”

  Kendra waved off the comment. “Steven? Oh, nothing of the sort. Even when we were on during our med school on-and-offs, we were mostly study buddies.”

  “He literally said you might’ve gotten married if not for Martin.”

  “That’s his attempt at humor. Trust me, it’s purely platonic. Look, I’ve been a widow for five years and see him almost every day. If he was nursing an old crush, I think he would’ve acted on it by now.”

  Laurie decided to let the subject drop for now, but made a note to find out more about Dr. Carter. “He certainly had a lot to say about Martin. Infidelity? Lawsuits? You didn’t recall telling him that?”

  “The affair, yes. I told him all about it. No one else believed me, because Martin had them all convinced that he was such a doting husband to his poor incapacitated wife.”

  “But you said you didn’t remember mentioning the lawsuits.”

  Kendra shrugged and said it was a long time ago, but Laurie could tell that something about the situation was still troubling her.

  It was time for them to get down to the most important question at hand. “Kendra, if you didn’t kill Martin, who did?” Before Kendra even began to respond, Laurie scribbled the name Steven Carter in her notes.

  “If I had to guess, the affair started right after Mindy was born. Between his medical practice, networking, and keeping the Bell name on the lips of the social scene, he had always kept a busy schedule. But where most men would have made an effort to be home with their beautiful new baby daughter, Martin was even scarcer around the house. More glaringly, he’d ignore me when I asked where he’d been. He didn’t even care enough to lie by then. He’d just stare at me with disdain and then walk away in silence.”

  Laurie had no way of knowing if the account was true, and Kendra didn’t seem to realize that any negative portrayal of Martin as a family man only enhanced her motive to kill him. “I can’t imagine how infuriating that would be,” Laurie said.

  “If I pressed him about my suspicions, he’d tell me I was going crazy. And then he told his parents and all of our friends that I was jealous and paranoid, accusing him of cheating for no reason at all. So by the time I reached out to them for support, he had already turned everyone against me. Did you ever see that old movie Gaslight?”

  “Sure, with Ingrid Bergman,” Laurie said. The film had been a favorite of Laurie’s mother, so Laurie knew it was a 1940s-era adaptation of a play written by Patrick Hamilton. It had also been adapted previously in England, but most Americans were referring to the later version with Ingrid Bergman, Charles Boyer, and a young unknown named Angela Lansbury.

  The film was about a new bride whose husband slowly manipulated her into believing she was going insane, by hiding her belongings, staging the sound of footsteps in the attic, and arranging for the home’s gaslights to dim and brighten for no apparent reason. All the while, he told his wife that these oddities were figments of her imagination.

  “That’s what being married to Martin Bell was like. He was gaslighting me, trying to make me sound like a crazy woman to everyone who knew us. But I wasn’t making up stories. A woman knows when her husband is being unfaithful. The truth is that Martin wasn’t the kind of man who could be on his own. He was always in a serious relationship—two other very successful women before me. In retrospect, I think he married me because I was the one whose career would never match his.”

  “You were in medical school. You were planning to be a doctor.”

  A wave of sadness came over Kendra about the future she never got to have. “All I wanted was to be a good pediatrician—not a superstar. My point is that Martin needed a woman in his life. And even after we started having trouble, I was still that person. But then something clicked, and I could tell his affections were somewhere else. I would bet my life on it. And Martin could be very charismatic. There’s a reason I married him so quickly. He swept me off my feet.”

  Laurie remembered seeing him during his various television appearances and thinking to herself that he had the “it factor.” Alex had it, too. And look what ended up happening with us, she thought.

  Kendra continued to build her case. “Everyone suspects me because no one else would want to hurt Martin. But if he was turning on the charm for another man’s wife? He wouldn’t be the first paramour to be murdered by a jealous husband.”

  “Do you have any thoughts about who the woman may have been?”

  “Thoughts?” Her eyes widened. “I’m absolutely certain it was Leigh Ann Longfellow.”

  The name hit Laurie sideways. “As in the wife of Senator Longfellow?”

  “As I said: I’d bet my life on it.”

  19

  Laurie felt a chill go up her spine. She already knew that the NYPD was being tight-lipped about the case and that Martin’s parents were willing to use their influence to skew the investigation. Now Kendra was accusing Daniel Longfellow, New York’s junior senator, of murder. There was no way that Brett Young and the studio lawyers would let her whisper that possibility on television without hard, undeniable evidence to back it up.

  “I’ve read all of the news coverage of the case, Kendra, and never once saw any mention of Senator Longfellow or his wife.”

  Kendra rolled her eyes dramatically. “Of course you didn’t. The Longfellows made sure of it. They’re both masters at manipulating the entire political system and the mainstream media.”

  Laurie could see how little effort it would have taken Martin to convince others that Kendra was less than rational.

  “You seriously think that a U.S. senator shot your husband in the middle of Greenwich Village? Whoever shot Martin confronted him as he pulled into your driveway. A neighbor easily could have recognized him.” Laurie couldn’t picture it.

  “He wasn’t Senator Daniel Longfellow yet. He was State Assemblyman Longfellow, and he didn’t even represent our district. Could you pick a state legislator from two districts over out of a lineup?”

  Laurie paused to jog her memory about the timing of Longfellow’s elevation to the U.S. Senate. After nearly two decades of uninterrupted service from the same two senators from New York, one of them had resigned to join the President’s cabinet. With a vacant Senate seat, the governor of New York was empowered to appoint a replacement. He had turned to an up-and-coming star from the state assembly, a handsome former prosecutor named Daniel Longfellow. Longfellow had then been elected to a full six-year term three years ago, but Laurie realized now that his initial appointment had come right around the time of Martin Bell’s murder.

  “How did your husband even know Mrs. Longfellow?”

  “They both went to Hayden and served on its alumni board,” Kendra said. Laurie recognized the name of the Hayden School on the Upper East Side, one of the most competitive private schools in New York City. “Leigh Ann was everything I used to be when Martin and I first met: always put together, one step ahead of everyone, the type who was chos
en to lead any group she joined. And, like me, she also seems to be completely happy as the quiet woman behind the prominent man. Look at how far her husband, Daniel, has gotten with Leigh Ann at his side. After Mindy was born, Martin was suddenly volunteering to help run the big annual fundraising auction for the Hayden School. Guess who his co-chair was? Leigh Ann, of course. Part of the reason she had so much time to spend with my husband was because hers was in the legislature in Albany. All of a sudden, Martin was spending more time with Leigh Ann than with me and the kids.”

  “Did you tell the police about your suspicions?”

  “Immediately. I told them that if I figured out the two were having an affair, then Daniel probably did, too. I didn’t know it at the time, but rumors were already swirling that Longfellow was the governor’s heir apparent for the Senate seat, as soon as the previous senator’s cabinet appointment had been announced. Losing his wife to a celebrity doctor could have torpedoed Longfellow’s political elevation.”

  Laurie had watched as Alex had worried that one influential politician—or even a viral tweet—might derail his judicial nomination. She supposed it was possible that a different type of person, perhaps a truly evil person, might kill to protect his political stature.

  “Do you know what the police did to investigate your suspicions?”

  She shook her head. “You’d think they would keep me updated as his widow, but it was clear early on that I was viewed as a suspect, not as a family member. His parents, however, got the red-carpet treatment.”

  Laurie would raise the issue with the Bells when she spoke to them. She jotted a note in her pad as a reminder. “In what ways did the police treat you as a suspect? You were never arrested or even named as a person of interest.”

  “They didn’t need to do that. I could see the way they were looking at me when the detectives arrived that night. It was obvious they didn’t like me.”

  “Didn’t like you? A homicide scene isn’t a personality contest.”

  “Exactly. But they stereotyped me immediately. They even asked me to take a drug test. I told them absolutely not—not without a warrant!”

  “Forgive me, Kendra, but your husband had just been killed. Why wouldn’t you give the police whatever they wanted?”

  Kendra looked around the restaurant, making sure that they were still out of earshot. Three additional customers had come in, but Kendra and Laurie still had privacy. Laurie had a feeling that they had Dennis the bartender to thank for that luxury. “Because they were wasting time investigating me when I wanted them to find my husband’s murderer,” Kendra hissed.

  “I have to say, though: by many accounts, your demeanor was flat, and you were reportedly ‘out of it,’ so to speak, around that time generally and even after you heard about Martin’s death.”

  “Do I seem like I’m on drugs to you?” Kendra asked.

  “Now? Of course not. But I didn’t know you five years ago.”

  “Look, I don’t want to have to talk about this on prime time television, but in retrospect, I was suffering from very severe postpartum depression. I think it started when Bobby was born. It’s why I couldn’t handle going back to my residency. But then instead of getting treatment, it was on to the second baby. I’m not proud of this, but I wasn’t a good mother then. I could barely get myself out of bed. Martin—especially as a physician—should have recognized the source of the problem and gotten help for me. Instead, he ran around with his Little Miss Perfect Leigh Ann, and then left the kids and me for poor Caroline to deal with. After he died, I saw a therapist and got the treatment I needed. But his parents can’t see that I’ve changed.”

  Laurie immediately kicked herself for not seeing the possible explanation of postpartum depression on her own. One of her friends had suffered for nearly a year after giving birth to her first child.

  “You think your in-laws are still trying to take the children from you?” Laurie asked.

  “A hundred percent. And as much as I hope and pray that somehow you manage to make a break in the case, the real reason I’m doing this show is to placate them. They’re the reason Martin was the way he was—charming and talented, but ultimately cruel and merciless. I don’t want Bobby and Mindy to grow up like that.”

  Laurie was beginning to see a more sympathetic side to Kendra, but she was still having a hard time understanding why she hadn’t been more cooperative with the police. She moved on to the next topic on the list in her notepad. “There were reports that you had taken many cash withdrawals from your savings, but you weren’t willing to tell the police where the money went.”

  “It’s not that I wasn’t willing. I just wasn’t able to. I wasn’t in the best shape at the time given my postpartum. I needed to get out of the house sometimes, and anything you do in New York City costs money. Some days I would just get in a cab and ask the driver to take me out to Staten Island or Jones Beach so I could have solitude. Or I’d go on shopping sprees. One time, I blew eight hundred dollars on a pair of leopard print Louboutin heels that I’ve still never worn. Size seven if you’re interested,” she added with a sad smile. “Maybe wasting all that money was my quiet way of getting back at Martin for his affair.”

  Rebellious spending was a far cry from murder, Laurie thought.

  “I understand you need to rehash everything the police put me through, Laurie, but please promise me that you’ll look into what I’ve said about Leigh Ann Longfellow. I don’t think the police believed a single word I said.”

  “That’s the whole point of our program,” Laurie assured her. “We examine every possible angle, which is why I also want to ask you about the lawsuits that Steven mentioned. Someone was suing Martin?”

  Kendra waved a dismissive hand. “It’s the lay of the land when you’re a doctor. As much as I wanted to be a pediatrician, one of the downsides was the lawsuits that come with the job. And Martin had it even worse. After all, the people that he treated were dealing with chronic pain. They weren’t easy cases.”

  “So what were the lawsuits about?”

  “I honestly don’t know the details. Martin had stopped talking to me in any meaningful way by then. After he died, the attorneys reached settlements out of the estate.”

  “Who was Martin’s medical malpractice attorney? I can check with him or her.”

  “I have no idea.”

  Laurie made another note to herself to research the lawsuits further. She had only one remaining topic on her list and it was a doozie. “You said before you’d leave the house to seek solitude. Did that include going to bars?”

  Kendra groaned. “The tabloids made me sound like I was marinated in vodka twenty-four hours a day. I told you: I was suffering from postpartum. Look it up: it can make you fatigued one minute, then restless, panicky, and unfocused the next. I suppose people confused it with being drunk.”

  “What about just going out on the town for company?”

  “Not really. Honestly, there were days I didn’t even take a shower, it was that bad.”

  Laurie had to be careful here. The information about Kendra frequenting the Beehive was never in the papers, and she didn’t want Kendra to realize that she knew more than what had been reported in the media. She needed to save that for the cross-examination that would come when the cameras were turned on.

  She decided to press one more time. “I noticed you and Steven have a friend behind the bar here in Dennis. You didn’t have a favorite hangout back then?”

  This time, Kendra snapped her response. “I told you, no!”

  Laurie nodded and tucked her pen into the spine of her notepad, signaling that their work for the day was done. “Thanks again for meeting me on your time off,” she said. “We’ll be in touch when it’s time to start scheduling production.”

  She did her best to make friendly chitchat while she waited for Dennis to bring the check, which she paid with her studio credit card.

  Two strikes and the cameras weren’t even rolling yet, she thought. First
Kendra had lied to her in-laws about her willingness to help with the reinvestigation of Martin’s case. And now Laurie was certain she was lying again. The police would have confronted Kendra with their evidence that she’d been meeting a mystery man at the Beehive. She couldn’t imagine Kendra forgetting something like that.

  There is a good chance that I just enjoyed a cappuccino and gelato with a killer, she thought. She doesn’t want me to know about the Beehive. So that will be my next stop.

  20

  It was nearly five o’clock by the time Kendra and Laurie left Otto, but the spring sun was still bright, a welcome contrast from the dark Italian restaurant. Kendra was relieved when Laurie finally said goodbye as they reached Fifth Avenue. Laurie turned south and began walking toward Washington Square Park. As Kendra headed north toward home, she allowed the sunlight to warm her face and tried to calm the thoughts racing in her mind.

  At first, everything had been going exactly as she had planned. Steven had tagged along to make sure Laurie knew that she had raised her concerns about Martin’s affair when he was still alive. He also made her sound like a good person—something no one else did anymore. Even Dennis had pitched in on the effort.

  Even after Laurie started throwing questions at her, Kendra thought she had done a good job holding her own. She had prepared in advance, knowing that Laurie would be asking about the state of both her mind and her marriage, conflicts with the police, and cash withdrawals. If the conversation had ended there, she would have felt confident that she was on sure footing.

  But then Laurie had sneaked in one final topic. When she asked Kendra about going to bars in search of company. Maybe it was simply a shot in the dark, a question prompted by Kendra’s rumored alcoholism. But she had a horrible sense of foreboding that Laurie was referring to the man Kendra still knew only as “Mike.”

  She tasted coffee and gelato at the back of her throat from the mere thought of him.